Our first article on
the theme of self-control dealt with our ability to manage those whom we allow
to influence our own spiritual choices, and our second article discussed our
own attitudes concerning modesty/immodesty and how it both affects us and those
around us. As we conclude this short
series, we will tie our original topics together and examine how a lack of
self-control in either or both areas can bring about our own spiritual
downfall.
It is important that
Christians realize that nobody else, not even the devil, has the power to
remove our souls from salvation. The
only way that we can miss out on salvation is through our own choice to neglect
the will of God. Paul, in Romans
8:31-39, basically states this sentiment and tells us that we cannot be
separated from the love of God by anything (note: the overall context discusses
our obedience being essential and we should also tie this to John’s discussion
of what love truly means in 1 John).
Therefore, the only person/being that can separate us from God is
ourselves!
Having established that
no one else can separate us from God, does this mean that others cannot
influence us into separating ourselves from God? Absolutely not! Consider 1
Corinthians 15:33 where Paul writes, “Do not be deceived: ‘Bad company ruins
good morals’” (ESV) and 1 Kings 11:4 where we have the example of King Solomon
being turned from God due to the influence of his heathen wives. Although we cannot be forcibly removed from
God, we can be influenced into removing ourselves. Although many Christians believe themselves
to be so strong that they cannot stumble, there is a reason Paul writes that we
are not to be deceived in this! Our
lives can and are influenced by those around us, which is why it is immensely
important that we control those influences.
While we cannot always control those with whom we work or go to school
with, we undoubtedly can control those whom we make our closest friends and
companions. Are your “best friends”
those of the world or are they Christians? Does your best friend entice you to
go out drinking, clubbing, smoking, or to wear lewd and immodest clothing?
If we believe that our
worldly friends cannot or will not attempt to entice us away from God, or that
we are simply too strong to allow that to happen, then we are mistaken
(remember, Paul strongly stated not to be deceived). When we associate with those of the world and
see how they act/dress, we will be influenced into accepting it or even
influenced to the point of participation.
Seeing others dress immodestly impacts our thinking and can lead to lust
and/or fornication/adultery… even with the strongest of Christians! Romans
13:12-14 tells us to put aside the works of darkness (evil companionships, evil
deeds, evil dress, etc) and put on the armor of light. We are to walk properly, righteously, and not
in “lewdness and lust, not in strife and envy.”
We put on Christ, and by doing so, we “make no provision for the flesh,
to fulfill its lusts” (consider also 2 Peter 2:9-11; 1 John 2:15-17). By surrounding ourselves with those that have
not put away the works of darkness, we leave our own souls open for the devil
to take.
In the Bible we read of
men and women that were once righteous (and some returned to God), but were
drawn away because they did not control the influences on their spiritual
lives. For example, consider Aaron in
Exodus 32 and Solomon in 1 Kings. Aaron
was enticed by the Israelites to abandon God and to create a golden calf for
them to worship. Solomon, having been
granted great wisdom by God (1 Kings 3:5-15), disobeyed God’s command and
married heathen women. We are told that
Solomon’s wisdom exceeded the wisdom of all other wise men (1 Kings
4:29-34). If Aaron and Solomon could be
drawn away from God because they did not control those whom they allowed to
influence them, could the same not happen to Christians today? If Solomon, in all his wisdom, could be drawn away
because he did exactly what God had commanded the Israelites not to do (marry
foreign wives – 1 Kings 11:2), then why would we assume ourselves to be strong
enough or wise enough to overcome such influences ourselves?
Brethren, we should not
seek to get as close to evil as we can without going over some self-proclaimed
line (as we discussed concerning modesty). We are to avoid evil companionships
because of their influence on us and we are to be modest in our own dress
because it expresses our godliness (and because we can cause others to stumble
if we do otherwise). It is nearly
impossible to maintain self-control in mind and action when you do not control
the circumstances. In other words, while
you absolutely CAN control how you dress yourself, you cannot control how
others will dress… but you can make the conscious decision not go to a party or
restaurant with someone who is or will be dressed inappropriately! If they
dress in a manner that promotes lustful thoughts and/or fornication/adultery,
then you are to avoid such companionships (we have used immodesty as an
example, but the same principle can be applied to other sins: drunkenness,
smoking, idolatry, etc). In Philippians
4:8, we are to concentrate our minds on things of virtue, but how can we do
this if we surround ourselves with people that draw our minds away from those
virtues?
So, let us lay aside
the carnal mindset (Romans 8:5-7), leave the works of darkness, and learn of
the spiritual benefits of having fellowship with God and with one another (1
John 1:5-7). Do we not gain more
spiritually by associating with and doing good things for those of the same
faith than we do by allowing ourselves to be tempted by the wrong associations
(Galatians 6:9-11)? Remember, seek first the kingdom of God and allow that goal
to guide every aspect of your life (Matthew 6:33), but also remember that we
are NOT too strong to stumble (1 Corinthians 10:12)!
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